Day 2: My Old Foe Hanger Paid A Visit
We all do it. Especially in January. “I’m going to do great things and become a great person.” For some it’s about successfully training a one legged monkey to play soccer; for the less ambitious, like me and many other regular folk, it’s about losing weight and getting back into the jeans “you wore when you were hot.” We all have a pair of those jeans in our wardrobe. The very fact that they’ve never been thrown out only proves how amazingly determined we are.
I think our grand resolutions are borne of an innate need to evolve. Darwin is (or used to be) the authority on the subject of our continuous drive to become better versions of ourselves. He called the competitive race Natural Selection, which is defined as “the process whereby organisms better adapted to their environment tend to survive and produce more offspring.” Today, instead of being motivated by a desire to produce more offspring, it’s probably more accurate to say we’re fueled by a hunger to make a social impact, through our deeds, achievements and actions. Also through the fruit of our loins, but not exclusively.
My big resolution this year is self care, which I believe will have great knock-on impacts in other areas of my life. But as I said yesterday – it hasn’t got off to the idyllic start I’d imagined – but not in the Titanic sense. Stay with me, Jack, stay with me. You see, life throws all kinds of curve balls and change is the only thing that’s certain. So… adapting my plans as I go, instead of making rigid demands of myself, is more conducive to my evolution, which is a scientific fact.
If that’s not cognitive dissonance in action I don’t know what is!
Cognitive dissonance? It’s the act of making oneself feel better about shitty situations by persuading ourselves that we wouldn’t have things any other way than the way they are. It’s the fox who salivates over the luscious grapes hanging from the vine but can’t reach them. What does clever fox do when he fails after numerous efforts? “Keep ’em,” he says. He tells the vine to keep the grapes – he didn’t want them anyway. Genius.
I tell myself that if I can spot my less than ideal behaviours, they’re not controlling me. I’m also quite certain that a psychologist would have a field day with me.
But back to self care.
How did I take care of myself today? I didn’t stress at work like I usually do, and I left almost on time. Working over my ‘set’ hours is a regular thing for me, but it’d be a lie to say it doesn’t have a negative impact on me. ‘Cause it does. I drank the most extravagant herbal tea I could find, which of course was by pukka. ‘Womankind’ as the brew is so named, is ‘a delicate dance of organic cranberry, rose & sweet vanilla.’ Pukka has some excellent marketing people. But the tea does live up to the hype. It warms the cockles and drinking Pukka tea definitely makes me feel like I’m taking royally good care of myself.
Then I got stuck in traffic and got a particularly intense dose of hanger. It probably had something to do with the fact that I’d allowed myself pretty much NOTHING to eat all day, besides a wholemeal bagle, a few raisins, that tea, pop corn and a babybel. Recipe for belly rage if ever there was one.
When I finally got home I was no longer myself. By Jaysus I ate.
But hang on now a minute before you wrong me. I hoovered up as many healthy things as I could find. My efforts were nothing short of gallant. I started with the weird cardboard crisps I got in Lidl invented by some woman who claims they’re ‘up to 60% less calories” in them than regular crisps. I dipped about a hundred in hummous, then I moved on to sweetcorn. One scoop for the pasta dish I started making, one dish for ma mouth. I murdered a banana and 2 biscuits too. Then I ate the organic, wholewheat pasta dish, with leftover sweetcorn, avocado, tomato and pesto. Delish. Then I got cramps and sat on the couch. It was fab.
I think I’m getting the hang of this self care malarkey. Stay tuned.
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